Love At First Ink: A Woodbine Valley Romance (Tate Family Book 1) Page 15

  This was just like Carter, she realized. He’d do something to upset her, act like an ass, but then later apologize and act like a completely different person. She thought he would change. She thought the wild personality swings were normal.

  Now, she knew better.

  Elle looked her fill, then handed the ring back.

  “It’s over between us. I can’t marry you.”

  Carter nodded slowly. “I really messed this up,” he said.

  “Yeah,” she replied. “You did.”

  He actually looks miserable, she thought, somehow surprised. Was it possible he truly didn’t know what hurt he’d caused?

  She leaned forward. “You’re not a completely terrible person,” she said.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Someday, the right woman for you will come along, and you’ll realize she’s worth changing for.”

  “How do you know she hasn’t come along already?” he asked, eyeing her meaningfully.

  Elle glanced away.

  Carter let out a long breath. “Okay. I get it. I can take a hint.” He sat back in his seat. “So what now?”

  She lifted one shoulder. “Enjoy your time in the mountains. Then go home.”

  “I’m assuming your mother doesn’t know about this,” he said, waving a hand to encompass their situation.

  “No, she doesn’t.”

  Carter leaned forward. “Take me.”

  She blinked.

  “I’ll be your date to the wedding.”

  Elle started to shake her head.

  “Wait,” he said. “Don’t answer now. Think about it. I know how important this is to you. We could go together, play the act. No one has to know what happened. Hell, you can ditch me after the wedding. Whatever you decide.”

  “Why would you do that?”

  He sighed. “I have a lot of making up to do. Just let me do one nice thing for you.” One corner of his mouth quirked into a smile. “It’ll ease my conscience.”

  Elle toyed with her napkin. She hated to admit it, but she was tempted. Going with Carter to the wedding would buy her time before she had to tell her family the truth.

  But was it worth it?

  She tried to imagine telling Justin that she’d decided to take Carter to the wedding. He’d think she was desperate for approval, so desperate she’d trade what was right for what made her look good.

  And he’d be right.

  Even thinking about it made her stomach swim.

  “Thank you for the offer, Carter,” Elle said. “But I think it’s time for me to stand on my own.”

  Chapter 16

  Justin stood just outside the backyard patio. The guests laughed and talked over the last of dinner. He knew they'd be up late, sipping wine and enjoying the night air.

  "It looks beautiful," Jess said, coming up behind him. She leaned her head on his shoulder.

  Justin looked around. Elle had strung lights through the trellis over the back patio, and she'd worked some magic to make the tables look inviting. It was beautiful, but he hated that he saw Elle’s touch everywhere.

  "She's good at this," Jess said, echoing the line of Justin's thoughts.

  "Hm," he grunted.

  "You like her."

  He made another noise in his throat.

  Jess lifted her head and turned to face him. "I'm your mother. You can't pretend with me.”

  “It doesn’t matter,” he said. “She left today.”

  “She went to Asheville, not the moon. What’s the real hold up?”

  Justin sighed. His mom would say her piece. He waited for it.

  "Ever since you lost Adam—“ she started.

  "Don't," he warned. Then, because she was his mom, "Please."

  “Justin, you have to face this. How long will you carry this guilt? He made his own choices. You had nothing to do with it.”

  “I was there, Mom. I was a part of the life that led to his death.”

  “Adam was an adult. Did you put drugs in his hands? Did you push him to use more and more?” She gave him a look. “I didn’t think so.”

  Justin said nothing. What could he say?

  Jess sighed. “You know I left my friends and family behind when I left your father.”

  He nodded, but carefully. His mom didn’t say much about her past. Justin never dared to ask.

  “Well, he had drug problems. And anger problems. He took it out on me. He wasn’t a nice guy, let’s leave it at that.”

  Justin closed his eyes for a moment. He and his siblings had guessed something along those lines—and maybe Evan as the oldest had known—but Jess had been good at hiding the truth from them.

  “Mom—” he started.

  “Don’t interrupt,” she said. “I need to say this.” She took a deep breath. “It wasn’t fair to keep the truth about your father hidden. I know that now. No matter how much I wish it had been different, he’s a part of your past too. It’s time you kids knew that. Beyond time, maybe.

  “I carried your father’s sins for years. I raised you kids, worked full time and then some, and I bore that weight on own. I thought it was what I deserved because in my heart I thought it was my fault. My fault he used, my fault he hurt me. You know, I really thought that if I only cooked a better pot roast, or cleaned the bathroom like June Cleaver, then he’d be happy.”

  She shook her head.

  “You were young,” he said.

  “I was stupid.”

  She looked out over the happy crowd.

  “I got smart. I left, took you kids with me. But I carried that damn weight around for years. When I got a job here, Mister Vanhelt didn’t ask any questions about my past. His wife did, though. She saw right through me. She invited me to tea one time.” She shook her head at the memory. “I thought for sure she was going to fire me. Turns out, she just wanted to talk. She asked all the right questions, but I was stubborn. She invited me back, once a week, and it wasn’t until years later that I realized what she saw during our first tea. She knew I was suffering. She knew I was carrying the guilt around, too afraid to put it down. She helped me let go of what wasn’t mine to bear, to move on and focus on the good in life. On you kids. On work that I love. On being happy and grateful and alive.”

  Jess gave him a look. “That’s what you need right now. You need a wake-up call. Whatever needs to happen, whatever closure you need to get to let go of Adam, you need to do it. Otherwise, you’ll never move on with your life. You’ll never be happy, whether it’s with Elle or anyone else.” She put a hand on his jaw. “And you deserve to be happy.”

  Justin didn’t know what to say. He settled for wrapping his arms around his mom and giving her a hug. When he let go, she sniffed loudly.

  “God, you kids got big fast,” she said.

  The guests had kept up their chatter, oblivious to the conversation just outside the patio.

  "You're doing a great job here, Mom," he said. He steered the topic to more solid ground. “I’m glad you’re going to buy it.”

  “So you’re not mad at me anymore?” she asked with a teasing smile, her eyes still a little damp.

  “I wasn’t mad.”

  “You were madder than a wet cat,” she said with a laugh. “I took your plans away, and you didn’t like that one bit.”

  He shifted. “Yeah, well.”

  “You figure out what you want to do?”

  “Maybe.”

  “You’ll tell me when you have plans, won’t you.”

  “You know it.”

  “That’s my boy.”

  After Jess went back to the guests, Justin tried to shake off his mood. Was his mom right about Adam? No matter what Jess said, Justin could have helped his friend. He could have done something. And yeah, the idea of losing someone else close to him scared the shit out of him. Of course it did.

  That wasn’t the reason he’d pulled back from Elle, though. He was sure of it.

  She was too different. She wanted different things.

 
His mom’s words echoed in his mind. You’ll never move on with your life. You’ll never be happy, whether it’s with Elle or anyone else.

  What if he was wrong about Elle?

  He could ask her. He could get in his truck, drive to Asheville. Okay, yeah. It was a little crazy. He didn’t know where she was staying. But his mom would know.

  So he’d find Elle. Then … What?

  He’d ask her to bend her rules. For him.

  She’d likely take one look at him and turn up her nose. Say no faster than he could say, “Why not?”

  But what if she didn’t? What if she said yes?

  Before he could think twice, Justin had the keys to his truck out of his pocket and in his hand.

  There was only one way to find out.

  Elle stepped out of the taxicab. Her heel crunched gravel. Before her, Oak Bramble rose like a beacon in the growing dark. Most nights, Elle would have thought the house warm and inviting, but tonight, the sight made her want to spin around and beg the taxi not to leave.

  She pulled back her shoulders.

  You can do this, she told herself.

  But the other voice, the less-than-helpful one replied, Wait, why are we doing this? We could be eating ice cream and binge-watching HGTV with Theo.

  She ignored that voice—no matter how tempting it sounded. When the taxi driver had asked for her location, she hadn’t hesitated. She and Justin had unfinished business, and she had to see him. She had to let him know how she felt, even if she never saw him again.

  The only problem was that she wasn’t certain what she was feeling.

  She didn’t want what Carter was offering, but if a man who looked, dressed, and acted like Carter offered her that ring, would she have taken it?

  A week ago she would have said yes. No question.

  But she wasn’t the same person she was a week ago.

  She’d met Justin. And he … he moved her in ways she hadn’t expected. She wasn’t certain what it meant, or even what she’d say to him when she saw him, but it was as though there was a Justin-shaped hole in her chest. Some part of her ached to see him, to make things right.

  Tonight she wanted to know—one way or the other—where things stood between them.

  Elle circled the house and walked around to the back patio. Small globe lights lit her path, and the growing hum of happy voices called her closer. She could feel herself coming back together piece by piece as she walked closer to the moonlit party.

  She paused to absorb the beauty of the night. Lanterns strung in the trellis looked like fairy lights. Candles at tables flickered and threw cozy light on the guests. Each table had a few couples and everyone chatted like old friends, even though she knew the couples were all strangers to each other.

  She loved that about Oak Bramble. It brought people together and made them feel as though they were staying with good friends. She'd never known a place like this, and in that moment she never wanted to leave.

  She could understand why Jess loved it.

  And why Justin came back.

  All at once Elle knew he was close. She could feel him, like a wave of warm air. She lifted her gaze just in time to see him turn away from the back patio.

  She walked between the tables and was about to grab a glass of wine—because obviously, that would help—when someone touched her arm.

  She turned, knowing it would be him. Knowing it was the exact thought that had made her direct the taxi back to Oak Bramble. Anticipation hummed in her veins.

  “I was just about to look for you,” he said.

  “Really?”

  He showed her the keys in his hand.

  "Walk with me," he said.

  She smiled. “Bossy as usual,” she said.

  Now he smiled. It did something to her. Made tingles rush up her arm and sent a zing through her heart.

  “So let’s walk,” she said. Breathless, but certain.

  There could have been hundreds of people around them or none at all. She could have been anywhere. All she saw was Justin. All she knew was the way his hand felt, warm and rough against her own.

  She followed him outside the circle of warm light created by the party on the back patio. Someone had placed a line of mason jars along the path. Justin led her away from the crowd before stopping and turning to face her. They were far enough from the back patio to be enveloped by darkness, but close enough she could hear the music.

  Elle could see the reflection of the lights in his glasses.

  Justin started to say something. Stopped. Then let out a puff of pent up breath. “I’m not good at this,” he said.

  The night, the air, and the stars created a heady mix. Dinner with Carter had been an emotional roller coaster, and now she wasn’t certain what she wanted. Or needed. She had to clear her throat before she asked, “What do you mean?”

  Even in the dark, she could see his throat work, like the words weren’t easy to say. “I lost someone close to me.”

  She nodded. Adam. He didn’t need to say the name out loud. She knew.

  “It’s not easy for me to let anyone in. But—"

  When he paused for longer than she could bear, she prompted, “But?”

  “But you make me want to.”

  Justin held out one hand.

  Awareness rushed up Elle's body from her toes. Her heart fluttered in her chest. She stepped closer and placed her fingers on his palm. She traced the calluses for a moment, then rested her palm against his.

  Justin kept his gaze on her the entire time. From the mason jar lights, she could just make out the glint of his eyes behind his glasses. Heat radiated from him.

  He pulled her against his body. And then they were dancing. Not a waltz or two-step, just a simple swaying. An ancient dance with no words or steps, just bodies moving together, setting a rhythm as old as time itself.

  Elle's heart was full of equal parts doubt and certainty; she could barely breathe.

  Justin pulled her closer. He didn't have to try hard. His warmth was like a magnet, one she didn't want to ignore. She placed her head on his shoulder.

  When he spoke, his voice rumbled in his chest beneath her cheek. “You looked like you wanted to tell me something.”

  She lifted her head. “I did.” She thought of her original plan. Or lack thereof. Should she tell him about dinner with Carter? Would talk of Carter’s proposal scare him away?

  The idea of ruining this perfect moment made her want to ignore reality.

  “Tell me,” he said.

  She sighed, deciding what to say. “I know you don’t want the same things I do, and I’m not sure how I feel about that.”

  Justin’s sigh brushed past her cheek.

  She was quiet. Thinking. She looked into his eyes, but the night kept her from finding the answers she wanted. “What if we put it aside for one night?” she asked.

  When he didn’t say a word, she was worried he would be the smart one. He’d see what a terrible idea it was. They were two strangers from two different worlds. They had no business ignoring reality.

  “I’ll go if you want me to,” she said. “I’ll leave.” She searched his face, but couldn’t read his expression. His brows were drawn, his eyes dark.

  When he spoke again, she felt the rumble in his chest. "Don't go," he said. His eyes were shadowed, but she could tell he was watching her. Waiting.

  She didn’t want to think anymore. She didn’t want to examine her past, her actions. Didn’t want to think about the future or what would happen tomorrow or the next day. Or, what would happen after she did what she’d been dying to do ever since he’d caught her on the jetway.

  "Would you kiss me, please?" she asked.

  He moved closer, then closer still until his lips touched hers. Gentle pressure. A pause. Then again.

  She was lost. The kiss was simple. A touch, a brush of skin against skin. This wasn’t the heady rush of their croissant-killing kiss. This was a question. A dance.

  This her body said. T
his is what I want.

  Justin pulled back. "Stay with me tonight," he said.

  Elle leaned forward, pressing her lips to his jaw, feeling the tension running through him like a live wire. All for her.

  Power and desire coursed through her body, making her brave.

  "Yes," she said. She stepped back, bringing him with her, and leading the way.

  Elle might have led Justin to the door of his place, but the moment they crossed the threshold, he took over. He flicked on a lamp with one hand while tugging her after him with the other. She had seconds to note the wood lining the walls, the vast window looking into the night.

  Then all she could see—all she wanted to see—was Justin.

  He kissed her like he couldn’t get enough. Elle had kissed and had been kissed, but never like this.

  She pulled back. “Wait,” she said. “I need—a moment.”

  Justin stood before her, his body taut. She reached out to him, and he stepped closer. Elle ran her hands over his chest, slowly, gently, letting herself grow more comfortable with being so close to him.

  Justin watched her from beneath lowered brows. A muscle ticked in his jaw. She ran her fingertips over his face, letting his stubble rub against her skin. He leaned into her hand.

  “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” he said, his voice gruff.

  Elle smiled. “Thank you,” she said. “But there’s not much I don’t want to do.”

  His smile turned predatory, even as he waited for her to make the next move.

  Only too happy to oblige, Elle lifted to her toes. Justin leaned down, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. Their lips touched, a feather light brush. Then she kissed him again, putting every last inch of pent-up tension and desire into the kiss.

  Justin groaned. He spun, and she moved with him. Together they fell back onto the bed.

  Elle came up for air to laugh. “I’m surprised you can fit a bed in here,” she said.

  “Quiet, you,” he said back, kissing his way down her neck. “We can argue about my place later. Right now, I’d prefer to focus on something else.”